Tender Kenversations

Ken Krekeler : What if saving my life meant drinking your own pee? Would you do it? COULD you do it?

Blond Girl1 : Yes I could.
Blond Girl1 : i dont know if i would

Ken Krekeler : What if it was MY pee?

Ken Krekeler : (I have to know, it's for a school project)

Blond Girl1 : maybe not
Blond Girl1 : yours

Ken Krekeler : It's not a little bit, it's a big ol' gallon. Big ol' jug-o-pee.

Blond Girl1 : well no then
Blond Girl1 : thats a bit much

Ken Krekeler : well, hey, that's fine, hey. glad to know where you stand. glad to know it.

Blond Girl1 : plus unsanitary

Ken Krekeler : my pee, though? I piss excellence

Blond Girl1 : have you tried it

Ken Krekeler : No, but I have imagined it many times, and it would be a lucious cider warmth which tickled the palate in shades of deep violet and ocre

Blond Girl1 : oh really

Ken Krekeler : anyway, you're kinda grossing me out with this, so I'm gonna go now

(Three minutes elapse.)

Ken Krekeler : hey do you still have the conversation we just had?
Ken Krekeler : like to copy and paste

Blond Girl1 : yes

Ken Krekeler : okay um, can you copy and paste that and send it to me?

Ken Krekeler : i'm like not even kidding

Blond Girl1 : to ur email

Ken Krekeler : yes yes

Blond Girl1 : or aim

Ken Krekeler : email. kentopia@ameritech.net

Blond Girl1 : ok

Ken Krekeler : also I'll be using your face picture on my website briefly
Ken Krekeler : just you know fyi

Blond Girl1 : ok
Blond Girl1 : why

Ken Krekeler : ha! so trusting. excellent. SEND ME THE THINGY

Blond Girl1 : ok
Blond Girl1 : ok
Blond Girl1 : i sent it

Ken Krekeler : I'm awaiting its arrival. Ken Krekeler appreciates your co-operation!

(Nine seconds elapse.)

Ken Krekeler : fucking bullshit's not coming!
Ken Krekeler : okay, send it over AIM. it's important!